Each day i go to work seated down make my breakfast drink then start locking case. Walking from the pantry to my workstation gives me a chance to glance outside the window. i don't seat next to the window anymore so yeah...Every morning whenever the sky starts to brighten it really makes me wanna be out there and not sitting inside.
Then i started to browse the daily online news just to know that the world is moving, things are happening and I'm not alone in this workstation staring at my pc everyday. Browsing through mel's blog always gives me a feeling of nothing is impossible. It's great to know that she's having each day filled with new experience and each night anticipates the next morning kinda life. Super cool. Abby wanna leave for her dream to be away from Malaysia and broaden her insights, she says there's nothing interesting here. TP is never giving up on his degree. Yeah time wasted on certain extent but he's got an objective and to be determined for so long is an achievement already and Evon is planning for marriage already I heard from Abby. We've came as far as erm..a decade's friend?^^bahagia namanye..its really good to know all these..and I'm here living each day peacefully i would say but contemplating if i should really get out of my comfort zone and start striving without worrying that if people at home could cope with their daily.

Oh well..I miss studying days. Of course there are sucky times when everybody talk shit about each other's performances on assignments but looking back I did enjoy every single bit of it. Late nights spent in front of pc doing research, super droopy eyes but still stay up to finalise the compilation of each other's part. Cursing each other just because we don't know how to make it through conflicts.

From time to time i sit and think a lot of "if only" and "what if" statements then a little voice inside my head will sing. Should I start visualising my dream house? I want an art room for me to draw, wood works, painting...A dance room with mirrors, a garden with greens and flowers..a veranda for "lepaking" with good companies..a big kitchen...kebagusannye~ I think should i leave for a more interesting job where i could explore and develop my capabilities..really..
Here I am, playing with those mem'ries again,
And just when I thought time had set me free,
Those thoughts of you keep taunting me.
Holding you, a feeling I never outgrew,
Though each and ev'ry part of me has tried,
Only you can fill that space inside,
So there's no sense pretending, my heart is not mending,

Just when I thought I was over you,
And just when I thought I could stand on my own,
Oh, baby those mem'ries come crashing through,
And I just can't go on without you.

On my own, I've tried to make the best of it alone.
I've done ev'rything I can to ease the pain.
But only you can stop the rain.
I just can't live without you,
I miss ev'rything about you.

Just when I thought I was over you,
And just when I thought I could stand on my own,
Oh, baby those mem'ries come crashing through,
And I just can't go on without, go on without,
It's just no good without you.

Without you.

dreams

Jumbled Up

Could not imagine but my sister has already got married, not sleeping next to me and moved to her new home.
Its been real busy and each hour is occupied with preparing and worrying for things that have not happened. Now its done I'm looking for a moment to rewind.

She packed her stuff like she's going for a long vacation but this time is more like cleaning up because all the packed stuffs will not come back to my cupboard, table, bed..etc..

Extremely happy and touched that everything went on well and that she's got a good man. I will miss her never-ending sakai-ness every time she's around, wakes me up on weekend morning just to breakfast together and lots lots more.

On my end, I've applied for the another department. Fortunately I got it and will be moving next month. Time to move, to learn new things and to stop taking phone calls. I've learnt a lot at my current department. Learnt how to be patient, how to be diplomatic, how to accept that rules will always be rules and mandatory, that I'm lucky, that I always have a choice, that people mature from fumbles and fallbacks, that corporate world is an advancement of my uni's politic days, that i now know that what I've gained in uni is not wasted at all even though I'm working a totally different field, that all the hard times with my difficult Miss Sum is paying off because she has taught me the hard but the most effective way to learn, that what I've learnt from my past experience whether its bitter or sweet means something today and its the only thing that nobody could not take it from me.

My friend Mel who just came back not long and now she has to head back to Australia to her work, away from home and from friends like me. Tomorrow is her last day so there will a be a gathering at her house. How am I to join the fun when i live 45km away from them and needs to wake up at 5am to work the next day. I'm still thinking.

Now, its another day after work..time to head home..

If only You have not known..

Wait a minute..do I actually have time to blog??

Yea..maybe? I've learnt that if your working hours are 7am to 4pm, do you have valid reason that you're working over time after 4pm? Answer is NO..:)..unless there's someone in the office you intend to check out..lolMy thoughts are, if you are efficient you should be able to finish allocated task within given time frame but again if time given is not sufficient for you to finish the allocated task there will be 2 reasons: (i)either you are not efficient or (ii)the allocated task is impossible to be finished.
If you are not efficient, you will be not efficient for the job even though you stay extra hours. There will still be more continuation the next day and this probably have bring in the second reason that allocated task can never be completed because they could, you won't be getting this job opportunity as well.
Now is that logic?:)
So I've decided, my daily goal would be, be as efficient as I can working within working hours and go back on time, skip the traffic and screw nonsense requests. If task are not completed, I still have tomorrow! Unless I don't intend to stay in the job..

holla world

Call Coaching

How was it?I don't know. How did you fair?OK. Do you hate it?Not really. Do you like it?DEFINITELY NO. Can you withstand the nonsense and requirements? ABSOLUTELY tiring to please people all the times. What do you want then? A HOLIDAY then a change of environment.

uno dos tres~....zzzz....

Awake on My Airplane~

Mid last year my dream was to still embark on my interest to be a creative photographer as a career. Reaching year end I had a reality check and fall back to my current job and start looking at the prospect in the company that I might have with the capability and knowledge I have in my own field.
I might as well strive for a post then creative photographer to be my personal interest.
Targeting for my very own camera will be the first step then.

Now and then I will have doubts whether to concentrate on my future or to attend to my responsibility at home on my family. Juggling between few priorities needs time and management planning which at the mean time I found a little bit messy.
Certain times when I chose to focus on my own priorities for the day I would let dad know that I won't be at home that day. Dad will then say "It's OK, go ahead, please do not because of me you all could not manage your own life or do things that you wanted to do". I take it as it is at that point of time but after second thought putting myself in his shoes I felt bad. Really. The last thing I want him to feel is that he's a burden to us. He's not and he will never be.

My sis is getting married soon, I can foresee only much more to handle at home since she's is now heading to a direction to start her new life, new home. Very happy for her indeed.
Ironically, I felt like I'm standing from a distance waving goodbye to my smiling sis who's soon to have her own castle just like the last scene we saw in Disney's Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, credits will roll and you see the line "...& they live happily ever after" ( now I'm laughing to myself, lol) I'm looking forward to know what will happen after that as well^^

Changes come and when we required to get out of our comfort zone that is the transition which ticks us sometimes. Things are ever changing and we are always required to grow from these moments. Consider myself lucky that I have a happy family,a home, a decent job, a car and accountable friends and colleagues. Therefore no matter how many chocolate flavors I have in the chocolate box, I believe they'll taste uniquely special and each flavor will be a wholesome experience.

-could you take my picture, cuz I won't remember -

Ellow~Heppi Yaprilss Fool

Yes, prior to the previous blog, the answer to where my watch is lies beneath the season's FOOL! oh gosh.... I reach my regular parking lot, pay the car park..Aneh put up his palm signalling me to wait awhile while he pass me the change, then he hand me an envelope and said "Ellow~ Heppi..Yaprilss Fool- - - - I just stare at him blankly and utter "Oh My Gosh~..Thank you!(being courteous)" whispering to myself and said I should know it!!darn! Roger is my colleague and he's the one who said: eh? where's your crazy watch today?...and I thought I was being too suspicious... That's why I love my colleague..they go all out...to impress you~..=.=ll

"Time waits for no man

Today your time is waiting for you

Happy April's Fool

Take it easy =) MDGT"

Anybody knows?

• It's Friday


• It's April's fool


• My watch got abducted by aliens since before lunch time


• It's 30 mins to off work and yes my watch is still not showing up